The experience of loss can feel overwhelming and frightening. We may experience periods of disbelief, anger, shock and feeling as though you are numb. It is usually a difficult time as we feel unable to imagine our lives without the presence of a loved one, whether that is a parent, partner, sibling, child or a dear friend.

When someone important to us dies, it represents an end to what has been familiar for us, and we must adapt to that new reality. Our lives are different after someone meaningful to us dies.

It may be a little less obvious to understand that this sort of a situation evolves conflicting emotions, the main emotion usually felt is a great amount of sadness, part of the sadness derives from the happening of the death and the other part of sadness comes from the fact that some sort of amazing miracle did not happen to save that person to allow more time together.

But in addition to the sadness and other painful feelings involved, a huge percentage of people who’ve attended to a dying relative, spouse, or friend over a long period of time, will tell you that one of the feelings they felt when that person died, was a sense of relief. Relief that the person they loved was no longer in pain; and relief at the difficulty of seeing someone they loved in pain and the frustration of not being able to cure them or ease their pain.

Relief in general is a positively experienced emotion and in this context it is also how it is felt however due to these conflicting emotions between sadness and relief there is also the conjuring of shame. Shame is experienced due to the fact that a positive emotion is experienced at the death of someone you cared about. This causes a lot of individuals to end up doubting their own mental health and can lead to a spiral of depression.

  • A loved one's illness
  • Loss of health
  • Passing away of friend/loved one
  • Losing a job
  • A miscarriage
  • Retirement
  • Loss of a friendship
  • Loss of a cherished dream
  • Selling the family home
  • Loss of financial stability